Becoming The One – with Sheleana Aiyana of Rising Woman – Episode #68

Sheleana Aiyana poses for Evolving Man Podcast

Sheleana Aiyana is the founder of Rising Woman, a growing community of more than 3 million readers. She is also my wife and life partner. Sheleana joins me on this episode to talk about the keys to successful romantic relationships and her recently released book Becoming The One: Heal Your Past, Transform Your Relationship Patterns, and Come Home to Yourself.


On this episode we dig into some of the key concepts from the book, and we talk about a few true stories from the book that involve our relationship and give some greater context and perspective on what we both learned.


If you are interested in the keys to attracting or keeping a romantic partner, or if you’re a Rising Woman fan wanting an inside look into our relationship, this episode is for you.


In this episode we dive into:


  • -The deeper meaning within Sheleana’s new book, “Becoming the One.” 
  • -What “being your own healer” means.
  • -Spiritual myth busting. 
  • -Self-abandonment. 
  • -Seeking external soothing – a conditioned pattern 
  • -Attracting inauthentic romantic matches. 
  • -Abandonment wounds and chasing unavailable love. 
  • -The foundation to healthy relationships: our relationship to self. 
  • -Finding healing through trusting yourself, your body, and reconnecting to nature. 
  • -Experiencing pleasure in life while being anchored in our truth. 
  • -Shifting from a breakdown to a breakthrough.  
  • -Authentic alignment.
  • -Questioning how you show up in your relationships?
  • -Scarcity of love vs. abundance of love as a mindset.
  • -Soulmates and soul families.
  • -Wounded inner child archetypes creating codependency. 
  • -The strength of community and friendship in supporting your relationship. 
  • -Twin flames vs. free will.
  • -External blame and taking back your power.
  • -How to get an unconscious partner to start doing the work with you.
  • -Parental vs. divine partner perspectives.
  • -Normalizing the desire for change.
  • -Patterns of withholding.
  • -Respecting your partner’s differences as assets.
  • -Attunement, sensitivity, and nervous system awareness.
  • -Specific dynamics and patterns in Sheleana and Ben’s relationship. 
  • -Seeing your partner’s intentions.
  • -Humility vs. defensiveness.
  • -Overcoming self-doubt.
  • -The Father wound.
  • -The value for men in reading “Becoming the One”.

Links from this episode: 



Ben and Sheleana pose for the Evolving Man Podcast


Sheleana and I wish you all the best in your relationships, and your life. We live a happy life with our dog @BodhiTheLovePuff on  xwәnen’әč, the unceded land of the Hul’q’umi’num’- and WSÁNE´ C-speaking Coast Salish peoples, now known as Salt Spring Island, British Columbia, Canada.